What’s
that smear on Grandad’s shirt? What’s that stain on Grandma’s
skirt?
What’s
that steaming in the dirt?
RUDOLF! Smells like Christmas!
Lots of
cheerful festive booze, fighting in the shopping queues
Just
disasters on the news
Yes it
smells like Christmas!
Pine trees
oozing pungent sap, Polar bears and penguin crap
Fido
drinking from the tap
Yes it
smells like Christmas
Easter
Eggs and Winter Sales, Got a waistband like two whales
Body
Odour/armpits stale
Yes
- they
smell like Christmas.
Where’s
it come from? That’s the question
Flatulence
and Indigestion CHORUS
Christmas
Trees and Christmas Bells
Lots of
awful Christmas smells
Hey! It
smells like Christmas
Cinammon
and Tangerines, Brussel sprouts and Christmas greens
Vampires
on the Multiscreens
Yes It
smells like Christmas
Same old
rubbish on t.v. Ants inside the Christmas tree
Santa? Is
that.... Reindeer wee?
Yes!- it
smells like Christmas!
Pounding
pavements, stinking feet, socks that whiff of rotting meat
Wheelie
bins all full for weeks
Yuccch!
They smell like Christmas!
Bird Flu,
Plague and flies abound, Slush lies melting on the ground
Unwanted
dogs and cats are drowned
Just
because it's Christmas
Santa
Claus has foetid breath The news is full of war and death
My
neighbour's Brewing Crystal Meth
Yes- it
stinks of Christmas!
The
motorways and railways jam, my mailbox fills with dirty spam
Everyone
hates Uncle Sam
It's
definitely Christmas
Flu
transmitted by the birds, carols full of empty words
Pavements
cluttered with dog turds
Really
smells like Christmas
Insurgents
play with guns and swords, Norovirus shuts the wards
The Malls
are full of sweating hordes
It must be
Boxing Day.
